Before reading this, let us be silent for several minutes. Start by thanking God then continue praying to your heart’s desire.
For my introduction, this is what I have to say – I am not religious but I am spiritual. It is just ME, my PRAYER and my GOD. Please allow me to share with you my journey – as an individual and as a pilgrim of the world.
Praying is like eating to me, it is crucial to my growth as I explore and learn about my spirituality. I keep on searching for ways to know myself and God for ages. Last August was an opportune time for me to attend an ‘Encounter with God Retreat’. The last retreat I attended was wayback 2003. I rarely attend retreats but there’s a jolt inside me telling me that I should. That retreat is extraordinary and special to me because it is our first couple retreat, two weeks before our 6th anniversary. After that wonderful event, I have found a bit of serenity. I thanked God for making me feel that magical jolt.
Apparently, I always try to find balance just like the Yin and Yang. I see myself searching for the kind of balance that would make my life turn 360 degrees. It is in this stage that I started to pray more often than what I used to. I have read the Bible and the books pertaining to that matter until I found Elizabeth Gilbert’s ‘Eat Pray Love’. Her mentor, Ketut Liyer, enlightens us with his words of wisdom: To find the balance that you want, this is what you must do. You must keep your feet grounded so firmly on the earth that it’s like you have four legs, instead of two. That way, you can stay in the world. But you must stop looking at the world through your head. You must look through your heart, instead. That way, you will know God. Such comforting words confirmed my thoughts and convictions that I should continue my soul searching.
In my constant search to find myself and God, I have learned the following:
- Love and accept yourself.
- Be grateful with what you are given.
- Be yourself.
- Learn to love solace and find peace in solitude.
- It is hard but we should forgive those people who have wronged us. We should also forgive ourselves, too.
- Take time to be silent. Silence makes us think and reflect more.
- When confused and undecided, be still and pray.
- Practice not to worry too much.
- Value the non-negotiable blessings in life like family and friends. Although work is important, our work will not take care of us in the long haul.
- Know God.
To date, 2010 is my most prayerful and busiest year. Whenever I do something, I pray. The act of praying, if correlated with correct thinking, can really do wonders to our lives. It all starts with having a strong mindset and ardent will to change and make things happen.
I also became an agnostic. After my discernment and constant prayers, I am back to normal again. That’s the time that I have proven that I can be ‘still’ without having to worry about my tomorrows. Knowing that we have a loving God makes all the difference. It gives me peace of mind which in turn brings gladness to my heart and fulfilment to my soul. My faith in Him definitely moves me.
It is only NOW that I can finally say I am living my life. I have died and have been renewed by accepting God in my life. I am starting to live my dream. I am no longer worried of the adversities that are yet to come because I know that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me (Philippians 4:13). I have made my own Yin and Yang in a rational way: Good > Bad = Balance. I believe that good must outlive the bad in order to achieve balance. Another equation for a happy and fulfilled life is this: EAT heartily, PRAY solemnly and LOVE unconditionally.
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